Friday, January 01, 1999

So I'm sitting in the dreaded Hall, thinking about why I had to be the one to get stuck with this burden.... I just wanted to be free. I wasn't born with the freedom I wanted. So I took it into my own hands to have. I was determined to go out and have some fun. The difficult part was getting out of the house. I would figure out what excuses I would use to get out of the house, I could always think about what to do about being late later. I think this time it was the usual I have some thing due for school and I have to go to so-and-so's house. It wasn't that I wanted to go out and be crazy, you know, it was just the fact that I couldn't do what all the other kids were doing and as every other adolescent I would do everything in my power not to be different. Ofcourse there were questions that had to be answered, but I'd become a pro. -Quick- my mother would throw out a, "What kind of assignment do you have to do for class?" Just as quickly, I'd spit back, "science project," or whatever assignment I really did have due for class, but that I'd already probably finished.
And just as much as I thought I was a pro at getting the truth past my mother, she was right there with me being a pro at trying to catch me in lie. -Quick- "What kind of science project?" But, haha, I'd already done it so this one came easy. Oh, but the interrogation wasn't over yet.
-Quick- "Where will you be doing this project, How long have you had to do this project, why do you have to have a partner to do this project, you know you don't need to be associating with all those worldly people..." and the questions just kept on coming, and determined to fight back I kept on answering. I'd won this one, or so I thought. "Ok, I'll take you to her house, and I need her phone number, and I need to talk to her mother." Well, damn, can't you just let me win one easy, I thought. But I got it all covered and she dropped me off ... and in the short amount of time that I got to roam the mall, or go to the beach, or pool, or whatever with the other girls- the kind of girls my mom called worldy- I felt just a little more free- a little more worldly.